Heaven's Above
by needtakehave
Summary: After Doyle's death, Cordelia deals with it in a bad way and ends up surprised.
1. Chapter 1

Children played across the street on the merry-go-round. They went zooming around and around and around. Teenagers bought hotdogs and drinks from the near by vendors. You could almost smell the hotdogs in your mouth. Little boys and girls walked off into the water of the beach to play and create new memories.

On the other side of the street men in black leather beat young people into bloody pulps for not paying the money they owed them. Prostitutes walked shamelessly down the block trying to make money. Vampires sucked the blood from humans slowly but surely until they were dry. Like you would drink a coke through a straw, slurping... Slurping the blood from the host.

Two sides of the street. Right next to each other yet farther than the sky can see. Two different worlds side by side waiting to collide and hurl straight into hell.

"Cordelia, come on. I made you some soup," Angel said from Cordelia's bedroom doorway.

Absently, she moved her hand through the air and replied, "Okay, in a minute."

Angel left and still Cordelia stood watching the two worlds wondering, wondering when they would collide.

**********************

"Here, sit down Cordy and eat this before you fall down," Angel commanded, leading her to the couch. Cordelia attempted a smile but couldn't quite get one out.

"Thanks Angel. I don't know what I'd do without you. You better not leave me too."

"Cordelia, now -"

"I know," she paused briefly to collect herself. "I know, Angel... Doyle did what he thought was right. Too bad he didn't think of the people he was leaving behind before saving others and getting himself killed."

"Cord -"

Putting a hand up, she stood, "Go on home, Angel. I'll be fine."

"You sure?"

Smiling, she touched her small, petite hand to his face, "Yes, go on now."

Turning, Angel left, locking the door behind him.

**************************

As the door closed, tears began to flow down Cordelia's pale cheeks.

"Damn you Doyle! Where are you? I hope you're in hell leaving me like this!" she thought to herself.

"I **hate** you!" she screamed into the air, heartbroken.

"I can't live without you either."

Suddenly a wild look came into her eyes. The look of suicide. She lurched up and ran into the kitchen rummaging through everything until she found a knife.

With her heart pounding in her chest ...baboom... ...baboom... ...baboom... She strolled into bathroom and sat in the shower. Without thinking clearly, she said, "I'm sorry, Angel, but death has got to better than life!"

Then, she turned and slit both of her wrists.

************************

"Cordy, my beautiful."

Cordelia turned around looking then let out a scream as a bright light blinded her.

"Cordelia, go back."

"Who said that?"

"Go back."

Frustrated she yelled, "Can't you people just let me die in peace!"

"Go back."

"**NO**!"

Then she was on her back in what looked like ... a cloud ... and above her came a man. A man dressed in white and so beautiful and lovely that she couldn't take her eyes from him.

"Oh Doyle."


	2. Chapter 2

"Doyle? Is it really you?" Cordelia asked, glaring through the light that flowed around him.

"Yes, Princess, its _really_ me... Better yet, what are you doing here?" he asked gently.

"Ahh..." she began, at a loss for words, so unlike her.

"I thought you were stronger than that, Cordelia," Doyle said, in a almost scolding, disappoint voice.

"Well, I guess you didn't know me that well, huh?" she asked in a bitter voice, tears springing to her eyes.

Doyle simply ignored the comment, like he hadn't heard it and ushered her out and through a clouded door.

***

"Where are we?" Cordelia asked, a little confused.

Her eyes hurt, everywhere you looked, light and more light.

"Your eyes will adjust in a moment and this, this is Heaven."

"Heaven," she whispered, looking around.

***

All around there were children playing out horses and merry-go-rounds. Some ate cotton candy, others candy apples. Then if you turned around there were teenagers kissing in the moonlight and a couple walking through the grass on a hot, sunny day. Everything was ... together.

***

"How can this be?" Cordelia asked, lightly, more of a gasp.

Doyle chuckled.

"We see everything at once, but for them, they are all alone. Those teenagers just see them and the moonlight. The couple the grass and the sun. The children, the carnival and the candies. They see what they want to see."

"Wow, so this is heaven. Where will I go Doyle?" she asked.

"Not here Cordelia," he said with a look of pain and disappointment on his face.

"Then where?" she asked, bewildered.

"Someplace better? France?" she asked, hopeful.

He just looked at her.

"Your dead, Cordelia, remember? You slit your wrists and your not going anywhere but to hell, love," he said with sadness in his voice.

"Hell?" Cordelia murmured, outraged more than anything.


End file.
